“Have so much fun at college! It’ll be the best four years of your life.”
While getting ready to start my very first semester of college at Fairfield, I must’ve heard this phrase dozens of times. The anticipation that I felt to begin this brand new chapter of my life was only amplified by all of the people around me telling me just how much I was going to love it. Upon my arrival, I felt more than ready to conquer my first year, only to be hit with all of the struggles and hurdles that no one quite prepares you for.
Now that I have officially survived my first month of my first year, I can confidently say that, while I have learned to love life at Fairfield, the transition was nothing like I expected. I found myself feeling homesick, lost, out of place and at times, lonely. It very quickly dawned on me that those who say college is the best four years are not referring to their first few weeks on campus and that there are many things about the first-year experience that nobody bothers to mention until it’s too late.
As a first-year, it is inevitable that you will feel homesick. No matter how excited you are to be independent, dictate your own day-to-day or maybe move to a new state, there is nothing that can prevent the feeling of longing to pet your dog one more time or have one more night’s sleep in your childhood bedroom. I never would have imagined just how much I would look forward to Thanksgiving break, no matter how much I desperately wanted to just enjoy the present.
I often found myself struggling to adjust to being in a completely new environment. The university that I had visited numerous times throughout high school suddenly felt like an alternate universe, where absolutely nothing was familiar. Nobody could have prepared me for what it’s like to feel lost in a place I’m supposed to call “home.”
I also completely underestimated how troubling it would be to look around me and not be surrounded by familiar faces. During the first month on campus, I’m lucky if I recognize even one face in the dining hall. The already pressing feeling of homesickness is only heightened by the longing to see my own friends whenever I go out, or even just leave my dorm.
To be clear, I am not making the point that college is scary and miserable. I simply believe that I was not prepared enough for the inevitable hurdles that I would face or briefed on how to handle them. I also know that I am not alone. After talking to new people and making new friends, it is clear that many first-years feel this way.
Of course, no one expects to have a perfectly smooth transition without a few bumps in the road. However, I don’t believe that first-years, including myself, are always fully equipped for what’s ahead. While it can be disheartening not to immediately fall in love with college life, it is important for all first-years to remember that there are no hurdles that can stop you from making it to the finish line. Be patient with and kind to yourself, because waiting for you on the other side of those hurdles are four years that will be exactly what you make of them.